And I can’t understand why Snickers haven’t got Mr T involved, barking at tweeps to get some nuts and meet his friend Pain. That would be good banter.

Doesn’t look like the brands have seen the value in Twitter yet. And I don’t really blame them, since we’re all such cynical barstewards!

I hadn’t thought about the @Schofe followers. You’re absolutely right that they are classic mid-market fodder. Can’t be long before someone datamines that lot.

Alternatively, who will be the first celebrity to be suborned into Twitter product placement?

Agreed on all points, and those are some pretty worrying threats. But networks on Twitter are easy enough to protect, because spam isn’t invasive, and the medium can be used in so many ways.

The spammers, auto-followers and hypertweeters can do what they like as far as I’m concerned. Good luck to them. But I can’t see any value in what they do, and I’m not interested in what they’ve got to say. Although they’re welcome to read my updates (except, perhaps, for @hotgirls2nite and its ilk, which I’ve had to block for obvious reasons).

I am a bit worried for the army of @schofe followers, who are a marketeer’s dream-come-true, but they’re happy enough to fawn over Phil’s silver locks not to be too exploitable – for the time being at least.

Twossers like @tweetergetter are basically penis enlargement spammers for Twitter. And like their intimacy-shy counterparts, the people that get sucked in want a quick fix, rather than grow their followers organically. And hopefully they’ll start to get bored when they don’t get the results they want.

So the integrity of the medium is definitely at risk, but I don’t know if anyone can really protect it… Not even the caped crusader himself, Twatman.